From Paris to the Pilliga

At 3.15am on Tuesday 9 February we scrambled out of bed in time to meet other ‘climate angels’ from the Pilliga Push camp on the Newell Highway 6kms northwards. From there it was about a 45-minute drive to Santos’ Narrabri Gas Project that is constructing 850 coal...

#Breakfree2016

  Heralding the start of a global wave of resistance to keep coal, oil & gas in the ground, on the eve of Mother's Day 2016 in the hottest year in recorded history, flocks of Climate Guardian Mother-Angels descended on the offices of Federal Ministers for...

#KeepYourPromise: reduce Australia’s emissions now

The Climate Guardians had a wonderful time on Sunday meeting both young people and caring grown ups at Templestowe College’s Sustainability Festival. We chose this inspiring community occasion to officially launch our #KeepYourPromise campaign, which demands that...

Coal Diggers Frack with Josh Frydenberg @Kooyong 200 Club

Coal Digger CO2 Coral Bleach and her daughter Bianca Bleach (who only tantrum threatens to sue when not snorting) joined Barnaby Coalala to raise $$$s at the exclusive (read secretive) Kooyong 200 Club. The BUMS* called on Josh Frydenberg to ignore the ideological...

#AngelPost

Of all of the incredible and unforgettable actions taken in Paris during COP21, the Climate Guardians’ experiences delivering messages on behalf of Australian children were highlights. Here and in France, not a single person has failed to be moved by the poignancy of...

Angels Arrested at Pilliga Blockade

See coverage and videos here: http://www.northerndailyleader.com.au/story/3715013/where-climate-guardian-angels-didnt-fear-to-tread/

2016: Organised and Armed

2016: Organised and Armed

Of COP21, James Hansen, NASA’s former chief climatologist, said: “It’s a fraud really, a fake. It’s just bullshit for them to say: ‘We’ll have a 2C warming target and then try to do a little better every five years.’ It’s just worthless words. There is no action, just...

2015: Reflections

2015: Reflections

2015 was a big year for the Climate Guardians, especially with our big adventure in Paris for the international UN climate summit COP21 in November and December. We are still going through all of the memories and images that have been created, but in the meantime here...

Who Wants Dirty Coal for Christmas?

Early on Christmas Eve 2015 Santa and a bevy of pin-up elves got stuck on the Minister Who Stole Christmas' rooftop  Santa and his elves have got stuck on the Minister for the Environment, Greg Hunt’s, rooftop to protest his approval of the Abbot Point coal port. Just...

Your Taxes @ Work

Mar 6, 2017

Bff Australian Broadcasting COALition captains Michelle & Vanessa Guthrie

Bff Australian Broadcasting COALture captains Michelle & Vanessa Guthrie

Backed by neo-heavyweights, including BUMS* CEO2 Coral Bleach, Michelle & Vanessa Guthrie (no relation) have united on the ABC’s board to usher in a new era of ‘balance’ from the public broadcaster!

Ever since Ruppie’s daddy Keith helped found the Institute of Public Affairs (IPA) and the LNP way back in the day—more than 70 years ago!— Coal Diggers have longed to be the guardians of Australia’s trusted public broadcaster. They just love playing with microphones! And given their role in preserving ‘jobs, jobs, jobs and growth’ in Australia’s prostrated coaltural heartland, Coal Diggers are after all fully entitled to not pay taxes or for advertising.

Rebranding the ABC: Australian Broadcasting COALition

Rebranding the ABC: Australian Broadcasting COALition

Thus, t’was indeed a triumph when the Turnbull government overruled that pesky independent selection panel to appoint Vanessa Guthrie— chairwoman of the Minerals Council of Australia to ABC’s board.

ABC board heavyweights Michelle & Vanessa Guthrie (soul sistas, no relation)

ABC board heavyweights Michelle & Vanessa Guthrie (soul sistas, no relation)

Thanks to the Coal Diggers, Australians will now fund and enjoy endless images of their leaders lovingly fondling lumps of coal in parliament while being force fed fossil fuel industry spin about renewable energy’s alleged role in causing blackouts. And for the kiddies, they’ll like so dig the soon to be released Hey Clean-Coal Fairy clip, adapted—with mineral intervention (oops minimal! 😘 )—from Wiggles’ classic Hey There Wally!

Community minded BUMS help ABC broadcasters learn to love coal too!

Community minded BUMS help ABC broadcasters learn to love coal too!

Hey Clean-Coal Fairy, you’ve got to save our BUMS!

Clean-Coal, Clean-Coal, Clean-Coal, Clean-Coal Fairy, clean that carbon outa coal

You’ve got to make coal sparkle green

Just keep on a’ digging and’a dealing

Your wand keeps going round in circles, so BUMS stay super rich!

 

Hey Clean-Coal Fairy, you’ve got to save our BUMS!

Clean-Coal, Clean-Coal, Clean-Coal, Clean-Coal Fairy, keep waving your wand

You gotta be a great musician, yeas, aah, if only

Gotta wave your magic wand

Oh yea clean our coal, so BUMS stay super rich!

 

Hey Clean-Coal Fairy, you’re gotta be a great magician

You gotta clean that carbon outa coal

No, no, no, you’re gonna be the best magician

Yeah, ha, ha, ha, the best magician in the world

Ladies and Gentleman, introducing Clean-Coal Fairy, the best

Magician that ever lived, totes bff to billionaires,

Hey, Magician we mean, ha ha ha ha ha

No, no autographs, no please, stand back, no no, ha ha

You might find out her secrets, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha

Remember magic isn’t magic when you know how it’s done

Hee hee, weeeeeeee

And now for Fairy’s first trick, Ahhh, thya, thya, oh that’s right

First taxpayers pay our BUMS!

* Billionaires United Mining Services – a joint venture PPP (aka Protecting Private Profits) with Australia’s LNP Leaders

 

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